Why is it though?

I'm still trying to process and digest everything that had transpired. It's difficult to wrap my head around how there's just such a significant shift and there's no answer to it aside from "that's just how it is". I'm sure that is in fact the answer, but it's so unsatisfying... Sometimes words aren't enough to describe how I feel.

I guess I didn't start my year off on this blog with a year in review type of entry but in a way, I think this post duals as one as well. 

Bear

I had a vision for the future that I had built up over the last few months. It was just the near-future but nonetheless it would pave the path for beyond that. But just like that, it slipped out of my hands. Perhaps a year from now, this will seem insignificant, but in the meantime, I'm going to have to wake up from this pipe dream.

Allergies to the cats?

As far as I knew, I wasn't allergic to cats but at the same time, I've had very limited interaction with cats prior to adopting Leo and #2. So one thing I was concerned about before I pulled the trigger was the thought of discovering that I was in fact allergic after adoption.

Over the last few months, starting around January, I've noticed that I've been sneezing throughout the day even when I'm not in the apartment. This is something that's very uncommon to me and for it to happen daily was slightly alarming. But what made it worse was around mid-February I started getting really itchy eyes and runny nose, similar to the symptoms I get from pollen. It stuck to me as odd because it was way too early in the year for pollen. It's a possibility, but my symptoms usually don't come about until April, so February was quite a stretch. So I guess I'll have the next few months to figure out if it's the cats that are the cause of this... but also which one? I did notice the symptoms after #2...

I also don't know what I'll do if I am in fact allergic to the cats just because as idealistic it is to just put up with it because I made the commitment, it's also affecting my day to day life. My eyes are constantly in pain from itchiness and I'm constantly throwing out my contact lens because they get dirty easily. But I'm also constantly blowing my nose every few minutes and causing nosebleeds, etc. This is with taking medicine/eye drops and that already alleviates the symptoms quite a bit. I can't imagine what it's like having to tolerate this every single day, I'm already miserable during the spring.

As for updates for the two, Leo is turning one in a few days! He's still very attached to me and does cry a bit when he's hungry. He's been chewing on cardboard a lot lately but I think he should be done with teething by now, so I hope he does grow out of it. As for #2, I think he's adjusted quite a bit but he's still very timid most of the time. He occasionally hops onto the bed and sleeps by my legs and lets me pet him when he's laying down, but he still runs away otherwise. I haven't been able to hold him yet either. In terms of their interactions with each other, nothing has changed since the beginning. They chase each other after meal time for maybe 5 minutes every day and ignore each other otherwise.

Disappointed

For a while I was disappointed in what happened. Now I'm more disappointed in you. 

2017 in Review

This year, my blog posts continued to decrease and I can't really promise that I'll be more active in 2018. In a nutshell, the latter half of this year was filled with travels and two new additions to the family. Here are some mini recaps by months: 

January - February: 

Survived working 60~85 hours a week

March: Washington D.C.

Didn't get a chance to see the cherry blossoms in full bloom because it was a bit delayed due to cold weather during those few weeks, but at least we got to see hints of it.

April: Baltimore

Not really sure what to say about Baltimore.. I honestly don't know if I would ever come here again if it wasn't to visit someone.

May: Washington D.C. (again)

I felt like the first trip left more to be desired, but when I had the opportunity to come again, it just didn't meet expectations.

June: Las Vegas & moved into my new apartment

Las Vegas was also a bit underwhelming, I think mostly because it was such a short weekend and I was just so exhausted throughout the bulk of it. The following week, I moved into a one bedroom a bit further from work.

July: Canada & Leo

First omakase experience in Toronto, thanks D! :)

But admittedly the biggest highlight of this month, maybe this year (sorry #2!) is Leo! (Short post on his adoption here)

I know he's definitely gotten a lot bigger now, but it's hard for me to imagine and remember him when he was still so tiny! I still wake up sometimes feeling as if he's grown so much but when I see him every day and because he has grown so quickly, it's hard to remember. To think it hasn't even been half a year yet. He's definitely given me a lot of headaches but when he snuggles up against me or looks at me like that, I can't stay mad as cliche as it sounds.

August

Mostly uneventful. I think I was trying hard to find a second cat at this time, but at the same time also wavering as it seemed like a lot of commitment. Because, commitment issues I guess.

September: Austria, France, Germany

Excuse the super awkward pic, but it was my first time fiddling with remotely taking pictures on my camera via my phone! This was taken atop the Hohensalzburg Castle in Salzburg. 

To be perfectly honest, it was the most stressful trip ever. In a nutshell, I broke my phone on the first day, missed a number of flights, and was reminded on how impatient of a person I can be.

October

Nothing significant here as well, but a bit of self reflection.

November: San Francisco, London, Iceland & #2

Semi impulsive trip to San Francisco. It's my first time in years in the West Coast without family. It was a nice getaway but unfortunately too short of a trip.

The second trip to Europe this year was a bit stressful as well because it kind of ended on a bad note (had a minor auto accident) but overall it was better than expected. I don't think I'll be blogging about this trip though. I was able to visit London again - I can't believe it's already been two years. I'm not sure if I've mentioned this before but London will always leave more to be desired.

On the day I got back from my trip, #2 was delivered to my apartment! 

Don't be deceived by how peaceful he looks! It took weeks before he finally came out from under the bed but he's actually sleeping on my leg right now as I type though. I've drafted a separate post on him, which I may or may not ever get to. It took me four months, but I finally found a friend for Leo! Leo is already a teenager so I'm a bit worried that it'll get more difficult for him to 'learn' how to be a socialized cat, but better late than never. I don't really want to go into too much detail now to keep things short, so maybe I will blog separately after all :P 

December

Uneventful, mostly spent reflecting and helping #2 adapt. 

While writing this post, I realized that it wasn't as quiet as I thought this year. I traveled quite a bit and there were two additions to the family! But for some reason it still feels a bit uneventful in my mind. I'm looking forward to what 2018 may bring :) I hope it'll be full of happiness not only for myself but for everyone as well.

Until next time~

Leo

Three weeks ago, I brought Leo home!

I actually was only semi-interested when I first saw his profile online, but not enough to go meet him. A week later, I went in to see some other kittens at the shelter, and happened to see him and I wished I had came for him sooner!

Some of you may know that I've been wanting a cat for the past year. Originally, I wanted a dog (and I still do), but it would be irresponsible to get one because of my schedule. Instead, I became more open to the idea of a cat because I started being around them a lot more and also because they're low maintenance.

The first day was relatively tame; he remained in the carrier for a while before finally coming out, and even then, he stayed under the bed mostly. He meowed a lot throughout the night. The second day, he opened up a lot more, most likely because he had all day to explore the room and get comfortable. In the beginning, he woke me up a lot in the middle of the night, whether it was meowing, running around, or scratching my pillow. But soon enough, he adjusted to my schedule so he normally sleeps right next to me throughout the night :) 

There's still so much I'm still learning, whether it's related to food, training, and just overall wellbeing of the cat. He's been growing quite a bit too and can be a handful, but he definitely blends into my day to day life now :) 

Maybe I'll do an update on him later on, but until next time~

One year post undergrad

Hey all! So a few days ago marked one year since my last undergrad class and in <2 weeks time would mark the one year anniversary since officially graduating! So I just wanted to do a bit of an update with my life right now haha. I also sort of want to blog (or even just write privately) more on day to day activities just so it's easier to relive certain experiences or moments, although I have to admit a lot of it can be pretty cringe-worthy when I reread them as well.

Without further ado... starting with work, I actually really do enjoy my job and the type of work that I do. My particular workload is a bit overwhelming because I feel like I haven't had much of a break since October, although the hours haven't been as bad recently. I also like my firm as well, although it's not perfect. There's a lot of downsides to it too, but it's also in line with downsides of the industry.

My studies haven't really progressed, and I'm still aiming for August to complete all my exams. Grad school is still on my mind, but at the same time it's hard to imagine cutting myself off from this job because as I mentioned, I do like it a lot! In three years, anything can happen.

Life in the city has been meh. The excuse of being busy of work can only go so far, and at this point (especially since things have slowed down), it's really on me now. So I really need to finish up my exams so I can truly appreciate what the city has to offer. I came here for that reason, so I have to put myself out there.

But apart from these things, I feel like a lot of different pieces will be coming together in the next few months until the end of the year! These past 24 hours, I've already planned four different trips, two of which have been booked already. Coincidentally, it's one trip every two months, so it's space out very nicely so that there's always something to look forward to. I'm thinking of doing something for December as well, so maybe that'll make it five!

My lease is almost up and it's a little stressful to think about just given there's a small gap between the last day of my lease and the potential new lease date which is typically on the 1st (mine ends on the 20 something). On top of that, the travels are going to be around the same time, so I'm not entirely flexible with being available to move out during that time frame either, it can only be on a very specific day, which is still TBD. But on that note, when I do move I plan to adopt two kittens!! I've been waiting for this for the past year and I've been increasingly more eager/impatient for this to happen, so I'm looking forward to it so much. Although I just realized that I have to figure out something when I go on those trips that I mentioned!

Hmm... overall, while things aren't perfect, I do think that there's a lot of things to look forward to :D There isn't a reason why this year wouldn't be great, so hopefully things go as expected! One last note, my birthday is coming up very soon and I feel like I did go through a bit of a quarter-life crisis a few months ago about... feeling old. I know many will just scoff at that, considering I'm not actually that old and in a way, my life is just getting started. At the same time it's not like I'm getting any younger either. I do still feel a bit negatively about the feeling of getting old, but it's not as intense as they were last summer/fall.

Anyways, until next time!